Dear Avery Alexis,
Today you are one.
I didn’t get to meet you on the day that you were born. You were greeted by your first mommy and daddy, two people who must have felt so much love and joy on that day. I can’t even imagine how wonderful it must have been to be there and to gaze at your sweet little face when you first arrived.
I didn’t get to meet you until nearly a year after you were born but when I finally did, I fell instantly in love with you. In fact, I knew I loved you before I even met you for the first time. The day that I got the call that there was a little girl who needed a home, I just knew. I knew before I saw your big blue eyes and your perfectly bow shaped lips that you were meant to come home and be with us.
The first day we met was a visit. We put you in the car seat that we had just bought, and we took you for a drive. I sat in the backseat with you and you wraped your little finger around mine and you fell asleep and I cried. My heart was so happy and so full of love, its like it overflowed that day, all of the love and happiness streaming down my cheeks. We took you home and you were quiet the entire time. We layed on the floor with you and you watched us, taking it all in.
Three days later we got to visit you again. That time you reached for me and you burried your head in my neck. I knew we had a connection. We took you to the store that day, and bought tons and tons of clothes, we bought a stroller, a baby bath, towels…My gosh we piled that cart up so high, buying everything we needed for our little girl.
On the fourth day we took you home. We had a wonderful evening with your foster family, who by the way, loved you very much. We had pie and coffee and and talked for a bit about our lives. When we left your foster mother cried.
In the past month you have transformed before my eyes. You smile and laugh all of the time. You started crawling a couple of weeks ago, you are now pulling yourself up on furniture and you have little blonde curls growing around your ears. Your cheeks have gotten adorably chubby and you now have little fat rings on your legs. You love to climb up on your brother, you follow me everywhere I go and you’re always clapping your hands. You like to make the “ssshhhhhh” noise and you love to mimic sounds back and forth with anyone who will play with you and you like to blow spit bubbles. You are a happy, healthy baby.
So many people have come to meet you and they all fall instantly in love. You were accepted into this family before you were even brought home. You were given a gift from your cousin, L., who is also adopted. It was his book that his mom used to read it to him. I now read it to you. He was so very very excited to have a new cousin as special as you. I hope that the two of you can always be friends.
Yesterday you visited with your first daddy and he brought you a birthday gift. Some small stuffed animals, a little blanket, a hair bow. These are things that I will keep safe for you so that you will always have them. They are so special. I want you to know Avery, that he loves you very much. You did not come to us because of lack of love on his part.
Today your brother insisted on a cake for you. We went to the store, the three of us, and picked out a little yellow and white cake with balloons on top of it. We brought you home, put you in your high chair, lit a candle, sang, and let you go for it. It made my heart happy, when, afterward, I saw that your mom had said that she hoped that you made a mess with your cake today. In a way I wish I could tell her that, yes, you certainly did. She wasn’t able to know it, but you did fulfill her birthday wish for you.
At bed time I rocked you to sleep. Three times. You kept waking up and you’d cry and I’d come in and pick you up and you’d immediately stop. I think you might be getting a little spoiled, but if any baby on this earth deserves to be spoiled, it is you.
Avery, you own my heart. Or, as your brother says, you own the “girl” part of my heart. All of it.
Happy birthday baby, you are so so loved.