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Quick update as I am emotionally and physically exhausted. sorry for spelling errors in advance. Am barely awake… We decided against adoption. It was PAINFUL. I refused to even see her picture. Reason being. I can’t dedicate the time to this baby that she would need, due to my mother’s Chemo And being her primary helper. I CAN NOT in good consience do that to the baby. She would need 24/7 attention unfortunately the next months will include caring for my mother. Other reason being she would need more than 9 months TLC. If this baby sticks. It would take away from her and her needs. she deserves better. As I said, it was heartbreaking. I couldn’t even bear her picture. but it was the right thing to do. And the right thing is not always what you want to do.. very very sad tonight.
on a positive note. Beta went from 82 to 599. They wanted to see at
Least 400. So I rocked the doubling time. Also I am sick. Much more
So than last time. Threw up
3 times this morning sick. Good sign? Again. Sorry for spelling. On iPhone And hardly awake. Good night all! Thank you for kind words Ans support


About Tricia #GrowingUpNelson

First grandaughter, mother of two, lover of books and bad music, aspiring to be a mostly vegan always vegetarian. Nearly 365 days Xanax free and hating it. #GrowingUpNelson

6 responses »

  1. I know that was difficult, but true you have to do what is right even if it’s not easy. Yay on the beta!!!!!

  2. I really respect your decision. It could not have been easy but you guys obviously thought this through a lot. You are doing what you feel is not only right for your family but for the sweet little girl. That takes courage.

    I’m thrilled to hear your beta news! Things sound like the are good so far!

  3. Such a difficult decision but sounds like the right one. You’ve got a lot going on right now.

    Congrats on the beta, how exciting for you! You need some good news like that.

  4. I wish so much for your sake that when we try to make the best decision it wouldn’t hurt. You have so many things going on right now, it’s got to be so hard to focus on just one, even for a short time. I am so proud of you for being able to think things through. And I’m proud of that beta!

  5. Ugh. I’m sorry you were left feeling so badly about it, but in the end your decision is completely respectable and is what makes you a great parent – you put the needs of the child first.
    Congrats on your BETA!


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